when god passed out brains i guess he sikipped me :(

to feel and know that you've hurt somebody to the point where they dont
want to listen to what you say...it hurts...not as much as what your own
stupid mouth said...but still, hurts nonetheless...

¹⁸But the things that come out
of the mouth come from the heart, and these make a man 'unclean.' ¹⁹For out of the heart come
evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false
testimony, slander. ²⁰These
are what make a man 'unclean'; but eating with unwashed hands does not
make him 'unclean.' " (matthew 15 18-20)

so if i've said
something that's hurt somebody...WHERE IS MY HEART AT!?!?!?
its been
definitely in the gutter and though this doesnt justify what i said...it
makes it all the more clearer that i have to work on my own heart...and
i just ask god that he fixes me up and helps me learn...so i never make
this mistake ever again...

this girl is beautiful
sometimes
she doesnt know it
and i just struck her
with a low blow...but
didnt know it
and when i found out
i thought just how much it
hurt
though i couldnt percive it as much as she feels it
i knew it
would be much worse..
and i put on my heart of optimism
andi
tried...
and....

...to ask forgiveness
and recieve scilence
its
definitely not golden
because
a slap
or punch
would've
been more satisfying
but i was given words unspoken
blocked out
with headphones
as she shook her head no
drowned out with a song
as
i explained how i was wrong
i speak my mind a lot
but my minds
not the wisest thing...
i stood there repeating
fighting the
emotions i was feeling
and paused until
i felt my tears
retreating
cuz my fears were recieving a barrage of words
that
would cut deep
but i woulda had that coming to me
so
i stood
there repeating...
i am so sorry
i am so sorry
i am so sorry
i
am so sorry....
but though she didnt hear me
i pray that she
recieves what i was sayin
cuz
that jerk that insulted her
wasnt
in his right mind...
at a loss for words
finally...
and i wish
i had that word loss
before this happened
so it wouldnt be like
this...
but..i guess its okay
but i'll just pray
and just hope
that
one day
she'll forgive me
and the insult that i spoke
will be
erased from her mind
but at this time...
i know
thats not
possible...