by Let me tell you about my trip on the greyhound, WOTN. I knew it was a bad idea from the beginning. How?? Not because of the fact that it was a two and a half day trip, not because I knew how uncomfy it was going to be, not even because of the shady cities I was about to venture through. Why then?? It started at 7:55 am - just before my bedtime, way to early to be anywhere if I slept on a normal schedual. So this trip was really doomed from the start.
I got to the station and for the life of me I couldn't find the greyhound desk. So I walked around the building to the other door only to find myself face to face with the people I just saw. Fail. Finally some kind, bus-riding fellow directed me to the desk that was right in front of my face.
The greyhound has a 50lb weight limit for luggage. Since I was moving, I tried to fit as much of my life into a duffle bag as possible. It seems my life weighs 56lbs. Not 50. I took out the only blanket I brought with me. It weighed 51. So a book came out. Good to go. Except now I had to carry this blanket. But on the bright side, the told me they'd load my luggage for me. Neat, I thought.
So, of course, the bus was late. I got on and was off! That's where it starts to go downhill.
In Amarillo, Tx, dragging my 50lb life behind me, carrying about 20 more pounds of life, I found a seat and waited. They loaded our bags and herded us onto the bus. As I was walking down the aisle I noticed that there wasn't very many seats. So when people sat down, it was full, and people were still in the aisle. Me included. Fabulous. The very unhelpful bus driver told us to go ask the lady at the desk what we should do. Me and three other very frustrated, would-be passangers tried to get our luggage taken off the bus. That was a no-go. She said "it'll be at your final destination when you get there." And the bus took off. Realizing I would now be on a two day bus trip with no soap/food/clothes had caused me to become quite distraught. I asked when the next bus came. The reply: 7 hours.
Hey how do you want to spend your friday, SSS?? That's right, at a bus station in Amarillo!! My mood quickly escalated from distraught to pissed. Really pissed. But, not a whole lot could be done at that point. With usual stoicism, I sat down to wait...and wait, and wait. The GH staff brought us food vouchers, so we could eat. How nice of them. My food was in my luggage, that was traveling away at 60mph.
I did a quick perusal of my new ticket and found out I had to stop in NYC to change buses. Any of you ever been to NYC?? How about grand central station?? If you haven't had the experience, it's one I suggest avoiding.
When I finally got on the next bus, I had a stroke of luck! Two seats to myself! SSS has long legs and so space to put them in is appreciated. We made it to the next few stops without incident. Things were looking up - until I realized I was being stared at by some creepy guy sitting alone. Great. Finally he asked if he could sit with me. I looked around at all the other open seats for at least a full minute and then asked him "why??" He said something about some chick hitting him with a seat, and I guess he assumed me asking why actually meant yes. So he sat. I ignored him. Hardcore. Immediately there was a leg against mine, an arm on my armrest and the inevitable stare drilling holes in the side of my head. He tapped me and told me his name. Like a pro, I spat out a fake one for him. Then he shook my hand.
Do you know hand-shaking ettiquette?? A firm grasp lasting 3 to 4 seconds is the norm. Duration of a handshake can also depend on the people involved. There's only a small bit of finesse required to know when the other person is trying to let go. I was definitely trying to let go after the alloted 3 seconds.
He grabbed my fingers and KISSED MY HAND. Oh dear god, how I cringed. I'm pretty sure my left eye was twitching. Stranger cooties. After a few half-assed questions he drove straight to the point and asked "are you single??" Since I'm recently liberated, and I really enjoy the notion, I said yes instead of saying I was a lesbian or something. That prompted this little exchange:
"are you interested"
"not at all"
He kept talking and offering valuable life advice like "dont let a bad man ruin it for the good ones." I wonder how often that line works... Just as I was about to launch a very long, very detailed speech about all the anime I've ever seen (it would have even sent all of you running) the lights came on and we pulled into another station. He got off to smoke. I moved. Later when the lights were on I noticed he had no front teeth. Oh joy. The back three seats were open, so I sat, put my stuff on the seats and glared in hopes that no one would sit with me. No one did ^^ So, I finally got a few hours of sleep.
But then, of course, I woke up. What was outside my window?? Red and blue flashing lights. So, the cops filed us all sleepily off the bus. We were in the middle of nowhere. At a gas station called Love's. Across the street is this place
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That's where the cops put us. Eventually some of us made our way inside, since the police said we couldnt leave. The people who run the place were nice and gave us all free drinks. After realizing we were going to be there for a while they gave those of us too poor to buy food some free fries. In return I give them free publicity!!
WOTN go visit this place in Okemah, Oklahoma!! They have all sorts of different foods
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So, we sat there for 5 hours. Why?? A bomb threat. That's what they told us, anyway.
During this whole ordeal, they guy that had been hitting on me disappeared with some other chick from the bus for a while. She had lots of hickies when they came back
No bomb. We sat there for nothing. Huge Freedoming delay... for nothing. By the time we got back on the bus, the sun was rising.
At the next stop the bus filled up. So packed like sardines with smelly people, crying children, and loud phones, some asshole decided he wanted to smoke in the bathroom. Man, do I ever despise that smell. So, we had to pull over. Again. Everyone knew who it was. After lots of yelling from other passangers he finally fessed up and we were cruising again.
A few hours later, there was a yell and then some very despairing sobs. Some poor young lady found out that her mother died. The greyhound made her late to see her mother, who was dying. She was almost to her destination. It was really sad, hearing the cry of someone that lost someone that close to them.
I got to Syracuse, the stop before NYC and they told me that since I was late to get there, the next bus leaving for Albany, from grand central station, wasnt leaving until the next morning!!! It was 8 pm. Oh boy, just kept getting better, I thought. So, I got on the bus resigned to sit there all night at the bus station like a bum. When i got to NY I asked my driver what gate I needed to be at in the morning(i normally wouldnt ask, but there's like 30 gates at that station) he told me 83. I found 83 and it said nothing about my destination on it, but the one next to it did. I asked the lady standing just outside gate 84 if that was the right one. She rips my ticket and says "yup. Get on" Apparently her bus was late in leaving and went straight through to worcester!!! (that was my final destination) I told her she was my hero and got on the bus. Oh, so happy was I.
I finally rolled into Worcester a full day and a half later than I was told I would be there. I was there, but you'll never guess what wasn't there. My luggage. So, now I'm at my place,
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*glomps*
