Days without Dream


    Number of posts : 725
    Age : 23
    What's up Tab : I'm reading manga. Come on over and read with me!
    Fanclubs : Deidara FC,Tobi FC
    Village : Scorpion
    Happiness bar :
    65 / 10065 / 100

    Registration date : 2008-05-19

    Natural: 10
    Power: 10
    Instinct: 10

    Days without Dream

    Post by UchihaAyame on Sat Dec 27 2008, 13:33

    ' wake up each day and wonder, did I dream?
    I couldn't judge you by your cover
    You're simply unjust in your words and deeds
    Yet that face, it could belong to an angel
    But NOT you...
    Yet, you catch my attention every now and then
    What is it I see in you? When to me...
    You're but a fool
    Is it the glimmer in your eye?
    That beautiful hair?
    Or is there something in you...
    That my eyes cannot see but my heart can feel?
    I wonder. I think. I judge.
    For one night of my sleepless, dreamless nights,
    there was you.
    I slept like I could have forever
    And true as it was, it was a nightmare
    Or was it? For in my dream, there was you
    Yet, I know only your name,your face, your voice
    What else can I see in you?!!
    Oh, Lois, what a beautiful name
    It suits you well like it suits an angel
    though, to see the true beauty of that name,
    one must say it right.
    Lois...not Lewis, not Luis, not Loys...

    I woke early this morning after dreaming of him... I feel uneasy about that. I didn't even bother to do some extra work yesterday. I fell asleep right away and dreamt of him. It's morning and I have to listen to the sermons of our English teacher. Why am I thinking of him right now? Its bugging me out. Why? I bet I'm just a speck of dust to him anyway. Just then, I glanced at him from across the room and I saw him look back at me. Yet, all I saw was coldness. That's what I saw... but no, that's not what his eyes were really telling me. This day of all days, his eyes were softly staring. He had that warm look that makes me feel fuzzy inside. Despite that cold, unwelcoming look the rest of his face had. The emotion in his eyes was different. I didn't even notice the bell ring. It was lunch time but I didn't think about that. " Hello?!!! Myra. My,my! What has got you spaced out like that? Ooh! Is it something nice? Tell me!". My friend, Lina said shaking me softly. "Oh nothing, just daydreaming" I replied. "About WHAT?!!" she yelled. "About school work" I smiled. "Eeeeek! Save me from THAT!" she acted like some damsel in distress. "Ahahaha!" I stood up smiling at her. "I need a break. I'm not having lunch today!". "Well, I'm not too!" she smirked. Suddenly, her stomach grumbled loudly. I laughed and told her "No, you should have your lunch! I don't think you can hold out any longer." I started walking out but she yelled "HEY! Well, can you atleast not tell anyone about that?". What could I say? I was being a good friend"Sure!". I took off my fake smile and went to my hideout, the rooftop. It was usually empty if I'm not there but when I opened the door, I saw Lois looking out to the city beyond the fence. Wind was blowing his ebony hair back. He was smiling. I never actually talked to the guy. We both acted like neither of us existed until now. I'm gonna break the ice. Here I go! "Lois." I said softly. The smile disappeared from his face and was replaced by this cold, blank stare. "What is it?!!" he shouted. I didn't answer him. In my heart, I never could. "If you have nothing to say to me, quit mumbling." "Do you wish me to speak to you?" I smiled because this is the first time he invited me to talk to him. He looked away and whispered "Yes." He looked embarassed and red as a tomato. "What are you doing here?" he asked me. He dared ask me? ME? This is MY territory. "I go here all the time. I just love the breeze here and the view" That was what I said instead. "Me too. I rarely come here,though" he finally looked me in the eye. He went back near the fence and sat down. I sat down beside him. I figured he'll get mad or something but he didn't. He started talking. "I feel I don't know what to do sometimes. All this emotion is bottled up inside me. I don't even know if I'm mad or just sad sometimes. The breeze up here helps cool me down and help me think clearer. And I wonder, am I really happy with all this?". Why is Lois speaking so openly to me? Did I judge him wrongly? i guess there must be alot of things I don't know about him because I never attempted to talk to him because I thought he doesn't care about anything. I listened to him again speak "Come to think of it. Myra, I've never really been able to talk to you since it seems like you're always avoiding me." I don't know why but tears started to run down my face. Oh, I was wrong? I was the one avoiding you? He placed his arm around me and asked "What's wrong?" I looked at him. His lips were so close to mine but I turned away. "I'm really sorry if I offended you, Myra. It's just that... not alot of people seem to like me. But I'm glad I had this opportunity to talk to you." I watched him walk away. He walked away just like that. I can't believe myself. I felt I could die in those moments.


    I probably shouldn't have done that. My friends asked me to just to have their laughs later on. But it was more than real to me. I was able to say what I wanted to say. I like her. It's been a long time but her strength reminds me of my brother's. She helped me fight those thugs years back but from the look in her eyes, she probably doesn't remember. I closed my eyes and walked away.

    It's finally dismissal time. The only time of the day I like. I met my friends again today. " 'Ey, Loe! So, did it go well?" asked Mick. He was the one that dared me but I'm no push over. "I did it out of my own liking. I mean no harm to her. This is done. I will decieve no one." I turned from them. I don't need them anymore. I continued to be friends with Myra for two weeks now until they told her. What fools. No, maybe I was the fool to have tried to decieve her.


    I'm here now, sobbing in my room. I don't know. I will confront him. Is what they're saying true? Well, is it? I can't take this. The phone kept ringing. It was him, I knew it! I finally answered it but I only told him "Go Away!". For those wonderful two weeks of something that was so magical like a fairytale happy ending. Now, I'm back to reality. How could I have been so stupid? Of course it was a joke. I'm just a clown to them. They told me such harsh things... "Back off!", "You're worthless", "Get away from him", "You're so easily fooled by our liar".

    It was lunch time again. Lois came running to the rooftop to find me. Now I'm beginning to think 'Why am I here? Did I want to be found?'. "Myra, I'm sorry. It started as a joke but I really like you. I won't play with your emotions. I would never do that." I looked at him and asked "How can I trust you?"."Please forgive me." He started begging me and followed me wherever on the rooftop I go. He grabbed my hand and said "I need you to forgive me, Myra. I would die right now if you wouldn't". He said my name so nicely but I couldn't forgive him. I ignored him again and released my hand from his hold.He looked down. He sounded like he was telling the truth when he said "I'm sorry". Again ignored he tried with one last sentence " I love you". I forgave him. I embraced him and said "I-I love you too." We had a nice life for six months atleast until he went away to some camp for summer. He was my first boyfriend, my first shot for love. I guess I'm not going to be unmarried and unhappy when I grow old like I once thought. He came back from camp, made me jump with joy. We were dating again but it was different this time. He isn't always smiling when we're together. Something must be wrong. One day, I caught him with another girl he met at camp. "Lois! What are you doing?!!" I said angrily.
    He knew why I was flaring up, but he just said "Hush! Do not speak" "What are you thinking?". He kept silent again. "Do not move" he speaked softly. Tears fillled my eyes and clouded my vision. I just kept remembering that day on the roof when he said "I love you". There are no silent nights after that. He has gotten far from me. He was playing me until the very end. He no longer filled my dreams with joy. My blissful sleep was replaced again by cold, sleepless nights. There are no happy endings in this world after all...

      Current date/time is Sun Jul 15 2018, 15:02